Wednesday, December 21

DEC 21, WINTER SOLSTICE - A DAY OF HOPE


Happy Winter Solstice, first day of winter, officially arriving at 2:44AM, PST. It's my favorite day of the year. Why? It's a day of Hope! While the shortest day of the year, it promises that just tomorrow, we'll have more light! We may be teased with just a minute or two each day, but one day soon, we'll wake up and suddenly be surprised by all the light!

I used to hate the winter months when I was younger and yet now, it has become my favorite time of year, if not weather wise, certainly personal growth wise. The shorter days are conducive to much needed rest and the chilly nights invite us to stay indoors, bundled up, doing less and resting more.

The winter season is in full support of our pausing, perhaps taking inventory from the previous year, deciding what changes are we'd like to make in our lives. There's time for contemplation and letting our creative juices flow.

Yes, yes, yes... we're smack dab in the middle of the Holiday Madness, so resting probably isn't high on your list of things that are possible, even though you may feel the need deep in your soul. 

But you don't want to miss this season of rejuvenation, so while you may not feel like it's possible to take some much needed rest right now, perhaps you can steal away a few moments, to release a little stress right now. Just for a few moments...  Deep breathe in... May the Light increaseth your heart, ... Breath out... let all the stress and tension melt away... Her endless blessings nourish and fill everyday of your life!   Repeat as needed:))

Then after the holiday hustle and bustle, make yourself a promise to take some time, just for you! Need help deciding what that could look like? Contact me and we'll discuss the possibilities. 

Happy Resting! 


LETTING OUR HOLIDAYS EVOLVE AS WE DO!


For the past month I've been writing a series called, From Here to There, Conscious Holiday Living, for Meditation Talks, an online publication. This is the last in a series of five articles I've written called, From Here to There, Conscious Holiday Living, that I've written for an online publication, Meditation Talks. At the end of the article are the links to the four previous articles. Have a wonderful Holiday season, no matter how you choose to celebrate! 

From Here to There
Holiday Traditions
Conscious Living
Part 5 - Living Beyond Obligation

It’s easy to get caught up either in the excitement of the season or to become cynical and non-participating. Mindful living challenges us to pause, check in with ourselves and make conscious decisions on how we want to partake in this holiday season, not from obligation but from a place of choice.

Thank you for joining me for the past five weeks as we’ve explored the possible evolution of holiday traditions and even possibly the permission to evolve your own holiday traditions, keeping what brings you joy and leaving behind what doesn’t.

The things that we’ve touched on so far is letting our holiday traditions evolve as we do; not letting anyone define for us how we wish to celebrate (or not); exploring the different love languages; other ways to show love during the holidays; and now we wrap it up with living beyond obligation. And once again, it all begins with being mindful and simply stopping, checking in with ourselves and choosing what will bring us joy.  Sounds a bit selfish doesn’t it? I mean after all, the holidays are supposed to be for giving and sharing, right? Well, often times the most important person in our life is neglected. And when they should be the first on our list, often, they don’t even make the list. Can you guess who I’m talk about? Yes… YOU! Really considering what YOU want and what will make YOU happy! Remember the old saying, “If mamma ain’t happy ain’t no body happy?” Let’s take it one step further and say, “If I’m not happy, if I’m saying yes to things that don’t make me smile, things that I can’t do with joy, then, that translates to passive/aggressive behavior, displaced anger, depression or all of the above.

Yes, yes, I know all the excuses. Here are just a few of our many excuses for saying yes when we should have said no. “I should; Common decency dictates; We’ve always done it that way; I don’t want to disappoint; My boss expects; My friends won’t understand; I can’t say no;” are just a that we might find rumbling through our minds.

But, just remember this, that saying YES to something
means saying NO to something else.

In beginning to discern what we can do this holiday season without feeling obligated and with joy, we can begin simply by asking ourselves a couple of questions. “What would the perfect day/week look like? Will you be happy when you return home that you went or will you be complaining about it and everyone there? Will it bring you joy? (And yes, sometimes doing something that we know will make another happy will bring us joy!) But this is tricky, because we may be tempted to say yes… to keep the peace… to please another, (sometimes it’s just our perception) but in doing so, it will make us unhappy, angry or sad. So, where and how can you compromise with joy? “I will go to Aunt Martha’s with you for dinner, because you asked me to and I know that it’s important to you. But I’ll bring my own transportation so that I can leave and you’ll be free to stay and visit as long as you like. How would that be?” Be sure to not let yourself get talked into to doing something that doesn’t feel good to you. You will just be mad at yourself and resent them later, which isn’t a good combo, especially for happy holidays.

If the answer you want to give is no, you could say something like, “No, you go and spend time with your family. It’s my gift to you.”

I was traveling on Thanksgiving Day several years ago when this new concept of holidays spent apart was introduced to me. I had a conversation with a gentleman who was traveling to Florida to golf while his wife went to spend time with her family in Denver! I realized that they were apart, each renewing themselves however was life giving to them and returned home, both revitalized from not putting their expectations on the other.

If someone has a panty twist about your decision, that’s you’re gift to them. It’s an opportunity for them to see where they have wounds that are arising. Just remember that they get to see and feel what they’re experiencing. You are not responsible for their happiness. In fact, the only happiness you’re responsible for is YOURS!

Many people have no idea what boundaries look like and you may be the first person in their life that has the courage to say what will and will not work for you. So be gentle with them and yourself, but don’t give yourself away, don’t say yes if you clearly mean no. You’re learning and modeling what self-care looks like is a gift to everyone, including yourself. Everyone gets to pause, check in with themselves and do the things that feed their soul.

So this holiday season, try living beyond feeling obligated. Be patient, it may be a new skill. Living life guiltless is something many of us have to learn how to do. Saying YES to you will mean peace for those around you. Happy Celebrating; however you choose to do it this year!

If you’d like to contact me with a specific question or if you’d like to explore further how to implement boundary setting in your life, just send me an email. If you’d like to receive my monthly newsletter you can sign up below as well.

5-Part Series
Part 1 - Holiday Evolution
Part 2 - Mindful Celebration
Part 3 - Love Languages
Part 4 - The Art of Re-gifting
Part 5 - Beyond Obligation  - To be published Dec. 21, 2016 



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Tuesday, November 22

DON'T LIVE IN FEAR... EMBRACE LOVE!


Statics were saying that over 60% of Americans were stressed about the presidential elections and so I submitted a paper to an on line journal about how I deal with this kind of stress in my life. 

It included limiting my media intake and trying to stay positive thus attracting more positive energy for the collective.

It was returned saying, "This could be helpful, resubmit after the election," and I did. I received it back with a note, that put a pit in my stomach, which in effect said that it was bad advice. After licking my wounds, I was able to see that it was in fact bad advice for the situation. (Remember the most important thing is to think for ourselves! Advice is simply an opinion.) 

I was reminded what needs to happen when any disappointment arises is not to stuff the feelings inside but to work through them. Of course, I know this! Stuffing feelings causes dis-ease in our bodies. We need to really feel what we're feeling. Be mad, get angry, think of the worst thing that could possibly happen, feel what that would feel like and then make peace with it. And finally, not to live in fear but to embrace love. That alone can be a major contribution to the whole. 

And ask ourselves, "What can I do to make the situation better? Stay engaged? Become an advocate for whatever beliefs that I hold dear." Change what I can change and accept the things I can't.  

Thursday, November 3

I'M HAPPY, I CAN BREATHE AND I'M HOPEFUL!


"My wife," (soon to be ex) " is telling all of our friends that I've gone off the deep end! That I'm living out in the middle of nowhere in the desert and that they all need to go and save me before I do something stupid!" he said.

This was the beginning of a very enlightening conversion between a client and myself one evening over dinner.   It was interesting to me that she thought he needed an intervention. I've only known him a short period of time but from my viewpoint, he's got it going on! He knows he wants to make changes and he's doing it! 

Then he began to run off a litany of adjectives of how he was feeling. "I'm depressed, anxious, confused, hurt, disappointed, and all of my security is gone! I'll be working forever now to fulfill my retirement requirements." 

And then... sitting under the twinkly lights on the huge manzanita tree under the desert sky, he said something that felt magical. He blurted out without missing a beat or even knowing what he was saying. "But, I'm happy, I can breathe and I'm hopeful!" 

"Oh my gosh!" I exclaimed, witnessing his clarity. "Did you hear those words that just came out of your mouth?" And I repeated them for him to really hear what he had said. "I'm happy, I can breathe and I'm hopeful!" 

Of course, we all go through the same emotional roller coaster ride of life, where depression and anxiety can feel overwhelming. But when we can complete the sentence with "I'm happy, I can breath and I'm hopeful," well, does it get any better than that? 

So go ahead, you don't always need to have a plan, sometimes you just need to breathe, let go and see what happens! 




Friday, October 14

Trust... Don't Stop the Flow of Energy!


When I left on the 2016 Summer of Hope Tour, I had someone going to rent my house for three months. Within two weeks, she had changed her mind. I could have contracted from fear, canceled my tour and stayed at my job. But when a friend offered that as an option, I could see really clearly, "Oh, hell no! I'm not going backwards!"

So I continued along with the plans that I had started. While the renter in the main house decided not to stay the little casita rented instead for the entire tour. I certainly didn't see that coming! I say that


God uses the backdoor and gives 11th hour information. 

I have learned to not stop the flow of energy, just because I don't understand how something will work out. My first lesson in this trusting was when I was remodeling the bath of the little miner's shack my dad gave me. I had stripped the bathroom down to the studs and it needed drywalled. I was working very part-time for $10 an hour, which certainly wasn't allocated for any extras.

One day a friend of a friend said that he was coming the next day to do the work. I said, "Well, what I know is that if you're coming, the money will show up." And it did. Had I contracted from fear, it never would have gotten done.

That was what I knew about this tour. It felt like I was to go and the first renter came along to get me started.  I am very grateful to her. Then, as things shifted and changed, I got many opportunities to practice trusting. And because I said yes, and was willing to trust,  I experienced many magical people and experiences!

Saturday, October 8

One Week Left - Summer of Hope Summer Tour - Discovering Pleasure


On the last leg of my 2016 Summer of Hope Tour, I re-entered the United States from Canada to MN. After a lovely time at one of ETL's Satellite Retreat Places, The Artabout in Whalan I continued south to my friend's lake house in WI in pursuit of discovering what is pleasure! Of course it's different for everyone. The dictionary defines pleasure as a feeling of Happy satisfaction and enjoyment.

The question came up, "How do we sabotage pleasure in our lives?"

Having been accepted on The National Calendar for the month of September to be recognized as Self-Care Awareness Month, (Still many steps to complete), pleasure is something that I wish to define, not only for myself but for our campaign.

We explored the possibilities of what pleasure is, and how our old beliefs, thought patterns, family codes and cultures play a role in our being able to fully experience pleasure. And how it interacts with Self-Care Awareness Month.  Of course, Self-Care Awareness is a bigger umbrella with pleasure being just one element under it.

We talked about what genuinely brings us joy and that giving and receiving should both be included in the pleasure category. It takes both to complete the circle. So while giving can be pleasurable so should receiving.

As I come to the final week of the 2016 Summer of Hope Tour, I'm staying in the moment, savoring every last minute. I find pleasure in housesitting in Kansas and spending time everyday with my mother's sister. But I can't help reflect on the fact that I've had a memorable, pleasurable summer! I've experienced gracious, generous people, been fascinated by many subcultures I've been privy to, made wonderful discoveries and of course learned more about myself.



Wednesday, August 31

2016 Summer Tour of Hope - Conscious Living

As a Personal Transition Specialist, I support others in their journeys to move forward in their lives.
Every situation, without exception, I use as a mirror for personal reflection. How can I improve for myself?

I had a spiritual director say to me years ago, "Pati, if you're going to resist every change that comes into your life, you may as well check out, because you're done! This life is about growth, evolution."

I do not take lightly the trust that clients give me. I try to honor each person's journey as uniquely theirs without judgement, knowing that we all have different chosen paths in this life. And I am filled with deep gratitude that I'm allowed to be a part of their sacred journey. 

Most recently I am working with a client who is making a life change. While supporting their journey, I have also asked myself, how can I use their situation to further my own path of growth. So I took a look my life and asked myself, "Where can I grow?" I decided to take a new look at my codependency issues. I also asked myself, "In light of my client's journey, can I also make a lifestyle change that would be beneficial to my evolution?" 

It may sound trivial, but it's a big addiction for me. Coke! Why? It... like most addictions... has an emotional element. For me... it's a reward. "If I clean... I deserve a coke... if I'm working outside... I deserve a coke... a road trip... fun time... I deserve a coke! So would my life be better without coke? I've been told that I have Adult ADD and I self medicate with coke. So would I be better without coke? I don't know!

But I do know that I will be a better person for consciously making decisions in my life. And so for now, in support of the bravery involved of what my client is claiming for themselves, I shall too claim for myself... A new beginning in every moment and for this moment, I choose to be coke free:)

A doctor said to me about my husband's stroke...

He will only get as better as he is willing admit to needing help!

And it's applicable in my life as well. I will only get as better as I am willing to need help.  I have support resources in my life and that's what I've chosen to do for my life's work, a Personal Transition Specialist. Feel free to contact me if you're in need of support or an empathetic ear!. 





Tuesday, August 30

2016 Summer Tour of Hope - Stuff (Part 2)

We left off last blog with my realizing that while my 22" suitcase held nearly everything that I owned, there was nothing in it that I could remember.

I'm on this tour with my 22" suitcase of my clothes for the next 4-6 months and I've not even used anything from the suitcase. I have a smaller tote to take into where I'm staying and that's all the stuff that I've used so far... and I'm well into over two months into the tour.

Do we surround ourselves with stuff because we think more is better? Because it is a status symbol. Because we can't stand to have empty space around? It's the empty space that makes room for us to feel. We surround ourselves with stuff so we don't have to feel?

Because we can't let go of the past? We're afraid of the future? It was..."Mom's, Dad's, Joe made it, Sue gave it to me... fill in the blank. You're actually saying that others are more important than you're sanity.

Because it feels like love? We can rationalize, I deserve it!

Because its a DEAL? You can always find deals! Guaranteed... Stay out of the stores...  While in Grass Valley, CA, I noticed how many new thrift stores that have popped up since I was last here. Why? Because as a society have so much STUFF and people will pay money for what they think is a bargain! Where do we place ourselves on sale? I say to my clients,  "If you NEED something, and you know how you're going to use it... and you know where its going to live in your home and you're willing to go into a high-end store and pay full price for it... then buy it!"

Because we don't trust that we will be provided for?  I may need it someday! However when the day comes, it's old, it's rusted, you can't find it.

When we have to carry, pack and haul our own stuff, quickly we can see what is really important. I spent two years traveling without a car and two years with and it was much easier to travel with just a 22" suitcase and backpack then it was a car. Why? Because in a car you can always add more stuff! In a suitcase, it fits or it doesn't. If it doesn't, you leave it behind!

There's no judgement. It's simply an observation. And I know from the work ETL does, that folks aren't ready until they're ready. It's been true in my own personal journey. It's just interesting to me how many people on the 2016 Summer of Hope Tour are dealing or not dealing with their stuff!

Monday, August 29

2016 ETL Summer Tour of Hope - STUFF (Part 1)

Holy moly! Like in the movie, Hello, my name is Doris, I'm noticing on my tour that people and THEIR STUFF continue to have an off balance relationships with each other. Why is that?

A client and her sister are being swallowed alive by trying to merge their separate life times of stuff into one living space! Slowly but surely they just keep plugging away and they're getting things situated. They're very inspiring!

I just received an email from a former tenant who has been trying to get back into the house after several weeks to get a box of stuff that she left. Really? And another tenant still has stuff in the work shed that was supposed to have moved a month ago. It's been hauled from Point A to Point B, C, D and E... and each time not only does it cost money, it costs time and emotions. How secure is it? Whose going to steal it, break it or use it? It's exhausting!

What in the hell is the hold that keeps us attached, worried about and stressed over our stuff? Why do we have this unbalanced relationship with objects! What are we searching for? Why are we willing to spend so much money and energy on stuff? Stuff that will eventually end up in the land fill or someone else's garage. And yet it still holds us hostage.

I hear this story over and over again, "When my parent's died, I threw everything away." I know it was true for me when I settled my dad's estate. He had soooo much STUFF! So much that it was too overwhelming to deal with. So much that while he had paid money for it, I had to pay money to get rid of it!

In 2009 when I left for what became the book A Year in a Suitcase,  I had left everything that I owned in my 22" suitcase at the ranch of one of my daughter's friends, except my backpack that I took with me, while delivering horses to Chicago. On the way home, there was a fire in the area where my suitcase had been left and we weren't allowed back to the ranch for several days. After my original, "OH NO! My suitcase!"f Not even thinking of everything else that was at stake for others. After all... it was MY SUITCASE and it literally held nearly everything that I owned. Finally, I realized that while it held everything that I owned there was nothing that I could remember. That's how important all my stuff was.

My suitcase held all that I owned
 and yet nothing that I could remember!

(To Be Continued)


Sunday, August 28

2016 Summer of Hope Tour - Joy in San Fran

Spending the day in San Francisco, I witnessed more joy in two men in wheelchairs than I've seen in anyone since I began the tour two months ago. One black man, (is that okay to say?) in his wheelchair had the biggest smile and sparkle in his eyes that was simply contagious. He brightened my whole day! It was worth fighting all the traffic to see! Well, that may be stretching it a bit, but he definitely was raising the energetic vibration around him.

Then, just a bit further up the road I could hear reggae music and here came another black man dressed all in blue bobbing up and down to the music that he was playing from his electric scooter. It was interesting to watch as he drove by, people began to smile and bounce to the beat.

One could only wonder what these two men had to be so happy about. Both in wheelchairs and both effecting those around them for the positive. And both HAVING A GRAND TIME!

Happy fun!!

Monday, August 15

THE HEALER - House boat - Who saved who? (Part 2)

By now, The Healer, had taken on so much water that she was tipped at a 45 degree angle and the propeller was out completely out of the water. It felt like we were on a submarine... dive... dive....

Once the propeller was out of the water time seemed to stand still. There was an eerie quiet that filled the space. For a hot second it felt like we had lost her. With my friend still at the helm, I begin yelling for her to grab my hand. The water was now up to her chest and all of the kitchen drawers were open and blocking her in. Finally... for whatever reason, she was able to leave the helm and tried to pull herself free. And just then... the miracle... everything began to shift... things no longer seemed hopeless. With everyone on the side and a rope tied to a boat, she began to return upright. For me it was clear... "Oh hell no... this girl's not going down on our watch!"

We were now surrounded by many boaters asking what they could do to help. And in the end, we tied her to land for the night and we were all transported back to the marina.

The experience and potiental healing for each was of course different. There were many little nuances. One in our party said, that a song that we had been playing on our way to the marina came to his mind... sometimes staring death in the face takes its power away.

The boys... got a new sense of self esteem... "We can conquer anything", they told me. WE ARE STRONGER THAN WE THINK! (One of the boys went on the following weekend to place first in his heat at the Junior Olympics.)

The ship's captain... I saw it as an opportunity to show all the nay sayers that she instinctively knew that The Healer had to been taken out to find out that the pontoons had many small pinhole leaks in them, something no one would have known had we not all been on board. I could see that she had been able to stand in her power and strength and say upon our return, "This is my ship and I know what is best for us!" I think my friend is so courageous and from my perspective, The Healer helped to heal what many of us woman struggle with, insecurity... "Did I do it right? Did I listen to my intuition and do what I knew was right for me, rather than listen to the opinions of others?"

And me, I was so grateful to be apart of The Healer's Maiden Voyage with my friend and family. Of course I see the hand of The Divine in everything and for me it was the challenge of, "Oh hell no... she's not going down on our watch! We were a hand picked team of survivors who were not going to give up so easily!"



Friday, August 12

THE HEALER - House boat.... Who saved who?


Words Matter. Words having meaning... intention.

My friend's houseboat had been named The Healer when it had its recent remodel. From my experience I could have told you that extraordinary things would be happening with such a powerful name.

The Healer had been bought about five years ago and out of the water for the past four awaiting her face lift. The weekend I came into town she had just recently been launched. So the next weekend, my friend, her sister and I spent the weekend onboard cleaning and organizing while the marina crew was putting on the finishing touches for her maiden voyage. The following weekend, two of my children and their families were in town and we were privileged to be her first passengers.

All excited for the adventure, five adults, two - eleven year old boys and one - seven month old baby girl, along with all our stuff, that spending the afternoon on a boat would entail, boarded the small water vessel. Last minute adjustments were made from the crew and we were underway. With my friend at the helm, we backed out of our slip, turned around and we were off.

Cruising at slow speed out of the marina, all was well. But as soon as we got onto the open water, the least little wake from the ski boats would send water up and over the bow. We weren't really sure why, but we made the necessary weight adjustments by scattering to different parts of the boat. The next wake came and it was so powerful we lost a lot of items to the water. "Run to the back!" came the command and when we did, the engine sat so low in the water it shorted out. The boys eventually got it running again and we puttered ourselves to the nearest cove for an afternoon of splashing around.

Time to pack up and head back... yep... the motor wouldn't start. The boys shifted some batteries around and we were off. In the meantime the crew from the dock had been called and had taken the baby and mama onboard as a precaution. The next wake that came washed everything on the boat through the cabin,out the back and into the water. Then a wave washed over the back and the next command came, "Kid's, jump off! Everyone else, all hands on deck, port side! Sit back and PULL!!!"

What were the secret fears each person brought along that day? They were soon to be revealed as The Healer lived up to her name! (to be continued)




Sunday, August 7

Half Dome - 19 Hours Later - We did it! (Part 3)

You may remember from the last blog that Kansas joined our group and with Half Dome in sight, I stood evaluating the situation with my knee. We had to go down before we climbed up the other side to Half Dome. Not only was my knee painful, I knew that I had to also make it back and so with some sadness and disappointment, I chose not to continue. But I did wonder, was any of this caused by fear? After all, Half Dome is a BIG mountain! And I had to wonder, "Was I afraid of other BIG mountains in my life?"
Skellings Michael in Ireland

"But what about hiking Skellings Michael in Ireland?" I began rationalizing with myself. "Doesn't that count for any accomplishment? I know, it's just a large bump of land in the middle of the ocean but it also had a billon stairs and no trees or railings to the top. Okay, Skelligs is only 714 feet abouve sea level and there are only 618 steps not a billon, and it was only 7 miles through what can be rough waters. But you did it even though all your Irish friends said, 'You can't go! It's too dangerous!' You courageously rode the small boat out through the choppy waters and hiked fearlessly to the top. How much scarier could Half Dome be? So could it be fear? I don't think so. It's my knee! It's honoring what my body is telling me without any judgments. Now that's the harder journey!"

More meds for my knee and the group was off and I was left to deal with my hurt pride.  However, a real rest and not feeling the pressure of having to keep up, felt nice. After a bit, all the meds began to make my knee less painful and I said to myself, "Self, you're not stopping here... you're going to go as far as you can go... this time." And so I hiked down the hill and up on the other side to the bottom of Sub Dome. After listening to my story, the ranger, who was checking for permits, said to me, "You can't hike Sub Dome with your knee... it's all stairs!" And of course, I had given my spot away, so there you have it... Divine Order!

My gal pals were having their own adventure. They climbed up the stairs at Sub Dome, then across to Half Dome and pulled themselves upward with the cables. Kansas, took the sweepers position in the group and followed everyone to the top. Exhausted, GI Jane felt like she couldn't go up or down and it was our little angel, Kansas who encouraged and coached her all the way to the top and back down again! Yes, literally... I believe that he was an angel, who arrived just at the time that this weary group of women needed to be supported by masculine energy.
GI Jane was taking the picture!

While waiting, I got what I needed.... rest in nature and solitude. I was able to talk with the people we had met on the trail all day long and privileged to hear their stories of triumph. I became the After Half Dome - designated picture taker. But most importantly, I felt like by my honoring my body, everyone got exactly what they needed! Kansas was beyond grateful for his experience, which was apparent from his hug and GI Jane had a victory that most likely wouldn't have been possible without Kansas! And me, I got to experience God in nature.

With the wise experience of GI Jane and her water purifier, we all made it back to the valley floor with my whining the entire way! The John Muir Trail... the trail never ending trail from hell! Switch back after switch back with no sign of noticeable progress descending. Eventually... 9PM we (me) hobbled back to our cars and I couldn't help but remember that we began this adventure at 3:30AM and it would be 10:30PM when we returned. 19Hours!

Are you kidding me? Who takes that long to he Half Dome? WE DID! Six courageous woman and one angel, all with our own individual experiences that we will never forget. And it is with awe and gratitude that I bow before each and every one for allowing me the honor of this sacred journey together.

And although I was ranting and raving the entire 8 miles DOWN, "I'm never doing this again.... blah, blah, blah.... " we had been taking ibuprofen during the hike, to help curb muscle swelling, so in the morning, we were all feeling pretty good. And as I popped up out of bed I exclaimed,  "OK... how can we make that better next time?"

Happy Trails...

Thursday, August 4

Hike to Half Dome (Part 2) Kansas, New Energy!

In my last blog, we left off where my gallon of water and food in my backpack were weighing me down and I was falling behind the group while climbing the billon steps to Half Dome. My little Sherpa Angel (my daughter) helped by carrying my pack on her front and her pack on her back part of the way. As a mom, it felt a bit out of order (ego), but as women on a journey together, I felt supported.

We continued the trek… the hares and the tortoise. While my gal pals seemed to sprint and then rest and refuel... I couldn't. So after getting my ego in check... again, I honored what my body was feeling. We continued to pass each other on the trail until about a mile or so from Sub Dome, when even the hares seemed to loose steam.

Then a miracle… We met Kansas. He was traveling alone and had hiked to Sub Dome but couldn't climb Half Dome because he didn't have a permit. My left knee (ego and pride) began hurting ALOT. Getting to the top was one thing, but I knew I had to hike the 8 miles back down. From the beginning, I was never sure that I was going to climb to the top of Half Dome, but on the other hand, I wasn't sure that I wasn't. I had no expectations. My reason for saying yes to the adventure had a little different flair than most. And I knew it from the first moment I set my foot upon the path in the very beginning.

There was alot of time for thinking and I remembered when my children were small we had a motorhome. We traveled… non-stop… from point A to point B. Finally, I had it with being a motorhome stewardess and said to my husband, "Do you suppose that we could enjoy the journey of getting there?"

That's what this trip was for me…. the journey, the experience, the spirit of it all. And from the very beginning, with the curiosity and trust of a child, I had wondered, "What mysteries would be revealed? What magic would happen along the way?"

We invited Kansas to join us back to the top and IF I didn't continue, he could take my spot. His male-supportiveness gave everyone a renewed energy to continue. He'd been to the top… he knew how far it was… his different persective kept our minds occupied until we turned the last bend to see close up… Sub Dome!! Holy Moly… there is an end to this trail!

To be Continued… One more part:)))



Friday, July 29

Journey to Half Dome - Yosemite (Part 1)

Who know when the invitation for six individual women to hike Half Dome arrived what each individual's experience would hold.

Years ago two of my friends and I went to the Kartchner Caverns in Arizona and it was enlightening to me to later discover that all of our experiences had been different. Chris, being a woman of science had a very scientific experience. Teddy, had just come along to accompany us and his experience was one of enjoying the moment of it all. While I had a very spiritual encounter.

That was the invitation the mountain held for us. She beckoned, "Will you come, without any judgments or expectations and embrace all that I have to offer?"

So six courageous women... different ages... different walks of life... and different life experiences all came together for a not yet known... pilgrimage to be Embraced by the Breath of God, as one put it.

Of course, starting off it was simply an adventure... a personal challenge for each... I can do it... I WILL DO IT!! Twenty miles round trip... we started at the trail head at 5AM and returned to the car at 9PM! Eight miles... straight up with a 4,800 foot elevation gain made the trek... what's a word that means more than challenging? Oh... HELLA HARD!!!!!

Now of course,  had I been training like my GI-Jane friend had be encouraging, perhaps it would have not been quite so tough. So while I was walking everyday, I just couldn't get motivated to climb stairs and do pushups! Sorry...  I wish I was... I really wish I was! But, I rationalized,  I've hiked the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu  (watch the video) and Waynapichui (watch the video) in Peru and while it nearly killed me... I did it! So, I was confident that I could do this too!

Because of my Peruvian experience, the heat, humidity and high altitude, I knew that I wasn't going to carry ANYTHING in my backpack!! Then for sure I could do it! Oh.... except for the gallon of water and food GI Jane insisted I pack along! Holy Crap! In Peru I ended up, just like Hansel and Gretel, leaving everything in my pack along the side of the trail, trusting that someone would come along and exclaim, "Wow! Just what I need!" (To Be Continued)

Happy Trails!

Tuesday, July 26

ETL 2016 Summer of Hope Tour


When I left Tucson, I had a couple of definite places to go, but everything in between I would leave to gently unfold. This is the first time that I've been alone and able to write so here is a brief rundown on how things have gone so far. First, I drove to Huntington Beach, flew to Sacramento, hitched a ride with my son and fiancé to Fort Bragg where I had the amazing privilege of marrying them on the bluff overlooking the sea, in the presence of God, family and friends.

Then I left with my daughter, son-in-law, and shared the back seat with my 6 month sweet grand daughter and not so small, BIG DOG on a road trip down south, via Mendocino, The World's Largest Salmon Bake, 4th of July Celebrations and a stop at Vichy Resort in Ukiah, one of only 3 champagne (effervescent) water warm springs in the world. (totally fun!)

Back for another week in Huntington, housesitting, walks, swims, family get togethers, and drinking beer.

Again, back on the road, heading to Yosemite for a not-yet known, pilgrimage to Half Dome with my daughter and 4 other courageous woman, after which, I drove up HWY 49 through the Motherlode and into Grass Valley. Because of the kind and generous spirit of many, I've spent the past two weeks, swimming, floating, boating, hiking, visiting, working, volunteering, gardening, cleaning, organizing and yes, drinking beer! I've stayed down town, in the mountains and on the water. As this is where I left in 2009 for my journey that began with A Year in a Suitcase, it has been a time of grace.

As I continue practicing living in the moment, I've kept my days from being planned.  When asked, "What are you going to do today?" I answer, "I'm going to just wait and see what unfolds!" And each day has held something special and magical.

We don't have to go away to experience something magical. But it does take conscious effort as it is easy to fall into what my friend calls a Six Inch Grave…a rut! We can let our personal and professional lives become... rote, routine, boring, and mundane if we're not careful.  It's tempting to follow the same routine, go the same way to work, eat the same foods, watch the same programs, etc. Then we can have the tendency to become rigid, complacent and inflexible.. all the while thinking… "This is the way it should be! I don't like change!" But if we can just change one small thing each day, or even change something every now and then, we will stay awake and living in each moment, and then we too can experience the magic each moment has to offer!

Wednesday, June 29

ETL 2016 Summer of Hope Tour - Vision Quest Begins

Friday was my first day off from work. I had a good talking to myself, "Pati, you're going to have to make something happen if you want to go on this tour." Just then a local morning talk show was on the television and I decided to email them and they had an opening on Wednesday.

That won't work! I had plans to leave on Saturday. Another good talking with myself with a reminder that a vision quest is simply about following the flow of energy. And so I changed my itinerary and will be leaving right after my interview on The Morning Blend, Tucson, AZ, on Wednesday, June 29, 2016. (If we can get a link, we'll post it on our website.)

Wednesday, June 29    The Morning Blend Line-UP… Look!!! We're on it!!!! 
--Outdoor Living At It's Best With Danny Lipford
--Humane Society Of Southern Arizona
--Evolve To Live
--Summer Style and Skin Health Cheat Sheet
--New Hope For Cancer Patients
--Wheeler Dealers
--Duel Volleyball Club
--Arizona Highways Magazine

Watch for my progress on Facebook and invite me to visit you when I'm in your area!

ON THE ROAD AGAIN!!  See ya soon! Pati

Thursday, June 23

COMFORT FOR THOSE MOURNING


One last word on the subject:

Years ago while in intuitive massage school, a place helping one to trust their intuition, I walked past the library and randomly picked up a book. It was written by someone claiming to have channeled John Lennon.

As I read with apprehension, I was intrigued with one of the things that John Lennon said. He was addressing his fans who years after his death were still mourning his passing.  I personally witnessed the many people who gathered at the edge of Central Park in New York next to the apartment where Lennon had lived, singing his songs and still wondering how could such a thing have happened.

John's advise was that we had to stop all the negativity! He said that he was trying as best he could from his position to take all the negativity and transmute it into positive but that we had to learn to do this for ourselves.

It may also be comforting to know that he felt no pain after he was shot. From the book  Peace at Last: The After-Death Experiences of John Lennon, John explains:

John: I lived the lifestyle of wanting to love everybody, wanting everybody to have the hope in each other that we can create a mutual language of acceptance, a mutual language of love.

John: It didn’t surprise me, either. I didn’t try to defend myself or plea for my life. Once my transition happened, it was such a blow to the body that there wasn’t really a moment of sustaining itself. I felt I was out of the body before I hit the ground.
Interviewer: So you didn’t suffer at all, then?
John: No, no I didn’t. I remember looking at my mouth, standing above my body on the sidewalk, looking at my mouth, and it’s moving like it’s trying to breathe. My chest is pumping itself. And in that one moment, I thought, ‘It’s true! We are fish out of water.’
Me: Oh, my. What an epiphany.
I offer this here to possibly ease any pain of those who have lost a loved one to a tragic ending.
May peace and love prevail! 





ETL 2016 Summer of Hope Tour - SETTING AN INTENTION… AND THEN TRUSTING!

"If I could find someone to rent the house and water the plants, I'd be on the road!" I nonchalantly announced to my two daughters, without even really realizing that I had said it.

Well, two days later, I met a young women who had contacted me and two days after that… she moved in and I moved out! Holy Crap! It really does matter what you think and say!

She was to stay for 3 months and so I made plans for an Evolve to Live 2016 Summer Tour of Hope  After my initial panty twist, "You're going to what?"  I decided to visit all 5 satellite ETL Retreat Spaces while collecting stories of amazing people who have had the courage to make life changes that made them happy. But how was I going to visit them all, as they stretched internationally including, Canada, Ireland and Switzerland? I had no idea. But I continue to believe that anything is possible.

THE MONKEY WRENCH:

I gave my two weeks notice at my job and am currently housesitting until I'm finished with work. I was to leave on my tour this weekend when my renter emailed me that she was going to look for another place to live. Initial thought! "OH SHIT! Now… no job… no income… now what?" The mind-fucking began… It's not too late to go back to my job and stay home for the summer…  OR…I could take the higher road and stay true to my intention and practice what I preach, TRUST, LET GO and RECEIVE! So I decided that it's not too late to TRUST that God/The Universe knows more than I do and will watch over the Riverbend Retreat Center and my finances. 

I am familiar with God/ The Universal tricking us into trusting. Several years back my daughter left her job in Chicago as a basketball referee with the unwritten promise she'd been in the running to be a NBA referee. However, when she made the move, the job offer disappeared and she was left with the same "Now what?" Of course, her life changed for the better because of it all, but at the time… it didn't feel like it. 

Today one of my clients asked me, "What are you going to do now?" 
"I'm going to keep my eye on my goal.  The ETL 2016 Summer Tour! and TRUST that everything is in Divine Order…that's all I can do, because I'm not going backwards!" Why? Because if FEELS right! 

Sunday, June 19

ORLANDO (Part 2)

Now, May I offer something for contemplation?

I have a friend who each morning tells me about all the negative things on his Facebook feed or what he's thinking about the politics of the day or what is wrong with our food! The list is endless and its draining!

We know from science that negative energy will attract more negative energy and positive will do the same.

One morning I said to him, "Honey, I'm not called to do anything about those things you talk about. I'm not going to go to a rally, and I'm not going to run for office. I'm simply not!

However, there is one thing I can do for the good of the planet and all sentient beings and that is to live my life filled with passion and joy! Now that may sound simplistic. But living life filled with joy and positive thoughts will raise my energy vibration which in turn will raise the energy vibration of those around me. We know this from giving massages, it's called entrainment. Or just think that when you give a smile, generally you receive one back.

I love the statement from the late Wayne Dyer: (Paraphrased)  You can't be sick enough to make one other person healthy, you can't be poor enough to make one other person rich, you can't be sad enough to make one other person happy, and in this case, we can't be sad, depressed or angry enough to bring one person back to life.

I find it helpful to try and let  God, The Universe, Infinite Wisdom, Source Energy…whatever your Higher Power is named, be in charge, knowing that EVERYTHING is happening in Divine Order and that certainly we can have compassion and empathy for the loved ones left behind. I the slain were light bearers on this earth and certainly they will be missed! But mostly we grieve for ourselves.

And through what appears to be tragic circumstances, I guarantee that we will rise up and collectively make the planet a better place. How can we as a collective, use this senseless act of violence and turn it into a positive? Well, we can keep on trying to best the best US possible! And that includes setting and reaching our personal goals.

And we can continue to LOVE… and that begins with the hardest thing to love, ourselves! Once we can all accept and love ourselves; that's when peace and love will prevail on this planet and reach far into the universe!  My book, Everyone Wants to go to Heaven, Just Not Now, may offer some consolation. 


May all sentient beings be filled with love and peace! Happy Father's Day to the amazing men in my life!!! Thank you for your love and sacrifices. 

Saturday, June 18

ORLANDO (Part 1)

As we try to recover and make sense of the latest (apparent) senseless tragedy in Orlando, personally I wonder if it was about gays or l
Latinos or was it just a place where a group of people would be in the early morning hours having a fun time?

I remember back quite a few years ago when a beautiful little baby girl was being born with just a limited time that she would be on this earth. The pregnancy was high risk for the mother and they had many tests that confirmed the fact that she would only be with us for a very short amount of time.

I was one of the very lucky people who were invited to be with her. Before I had gone to see her,  I had the same questions that many of us may be experiencing right now about Orlando... WHY? And our faith in a Higher Power can be shaken! After all, how could a loving God let despicable things like this happen? Is He listening? Is she there? Do they care?

As soon as I walked in the door of her home, the room was filled with a magical energy and before I even held her in my arms, it was very clear to me, that she was an angel who had come to unite, share and bring a renewed sense of LOVE! And that she did! I remember saying to myself, "Oh, I understand now… it's about LOVE… she's come to bring LOVE!"

I will always remember that experience as being one of the most spiritual and mystical experiences of my life. I will always be grateful that I was chosen to be apart of the first hand understanding that everything happens in Divine Order and no lives are lost in vein.

I watch now as people ban together, love, heal and proclaim… that LOVE IS LOVE…..
(to be continued)

Sunday, May 1

BECAUSE I ASKED...


Asking is something that I was brought up NOT to do! In fact, if we asked, we were certain to be asking for trouble! 

But as I've gotten older, wiser and braver, I ASK. It's not always easy as many times it is perceived by others (even myself) as bold or selfish. "Who does she think she is?" kind of attitude.

But… because I asked, two years ago on a trip home from visiting my cousin in Kansas, "Do you need any volunteers to get off the plane?" (On Southwest Airlines, if you volunteer your seat you are compensated quite nicely.) The following spring I went on my free ticket with my two daughters to  Puerto Rico.

And because I asked again last year, I'm on my way to Tulum, Mexico with one of my daughters!  Ole' (Glad I had my babies… they're fun to play with at any age!)

But even better, at the airport yesterday, I just happened to ask, "Do you have any seats that have no one sitting next to them?" The sweet agent said, "Hum, let me move someone for you." Wow! I wasn't expecting that! Then she looked at me and asked, "Are you traveling alone?" "Yes!" I replied. "How would you feel about a first class seat?" "Super! I'd feel SUPER!" So, first class, first seat next to the window and I thought, "What a wonderful start to my little retreat/getaway!" And so I ordered a rum and coke in celebration and thought this was all possible simply because I had found the courage to ASK!