My last trip to LA, I discovered a Basic Shamanic Workshop that was going to take place in Phoenix, AZ, which I quickly signed up for. I wanted to get it right!
What I know about these intensives as they're called, is they are about one's personal journey/personal growth. The last little pieces of one's soul that are still in need of healing, emerge at these intensives. And being that I am on a journey to become real and authentic, I was honest with the feelings that were arising in me.
The friend I attended with suggested to me, "Just change your language and stop acknowledging places of lack." I disagree with this philosophy. I believe that I have to take a look at the little places that still need to have a voice, be acknowledged, love them and then they can be set free. Otherwise what happens is they just continue to stay dormant, unaddressed and eventually these undressed areas can cause dis-ease.
While working at the Catholic Church, a priest friend said to me, "Pati, Jesus only condemned one people, the Pharisee's, people's whose insides didn't match their outsides." I spent years with my insides and outsides not matching, smiling and saying everything is OK.
I no longer do that, which can make others uncomfortable or perceive my being real as whining or looking for attention. But for me, it's simply sharing the real me, with my ups and downs and my coasting along status quo.
I don't need to be fixed, just a safe place to be real....so that when I find pieces of my soul that are still in need of being loved and accepted, I am free to do the personal work. I thank all of you who let me be real.....I love you.