ON THE ROAD AGAIN, SOMETIMES YOU JUST GOTTA GET AWAY!

Today I was going to write about support from the angels in numbers. However, I find myself on the road again and so I’ll talk about that.

I’ve been feeling a bit stagnate, the heat? (111 degrees today) the blues from my company all having left? Tears well up in my eyes often and I find myself saying, “I just need my mommy,” as tears began to roll down my cheeks. “It feels like my heart is closed again.”

My friend just told me about a shaman who had told her about the incredible energy vortex where we’re living in the middle of in Southern Arizona. He added, “When things are good, they’re really good and when then bad, they’re awful!” “Well, that splains everything…Lucy!” He added how important it would be living there to be sure to take time away as well.

A friend made an observation about me when I said that I was thinking to leave for a few days, “You can’t be alone with yourself.” I certainly I acknowledge that being with me is part of my journey. The aloneness can turn into loneliness. And I felt that I had been abused by neglect for the first half of my life so the loneliness brings up past hurts. (Which is how we heal if we give them the space to emerge).

However, I think the trouble right now for me is that I’m home by myself too much. I get up early and work on my projects until early/late afternoon, depending on the day. That’s it! I haven’t really gotten out into the community as I’ve been focused on finishing GPS and the projects around it. I work best when I can use the energy of others and then go away and be alone to create. It was great when I had company because I had a piece of both worlds. I could stay in my room in the AM working and then had time and people to play with later.

When I was married and our children small, my husband would come home from work and being gone all day, he just wanted to be home and relax. I on the other hand, had been home with the children all day and just wanted to go and do something or spend time with him. There were many when my children were young that I said, “Get in the stroller, we’re going out!” Sometimes you’ve just got to get out of the energy that you’re in.

Ultimately, I am very happy that my daughter called this morning and said, I book you a ticket to SFO. You have an hour before you have to leave for the airport!” (Obviously there is a bit more to the story.)

I know it’s a good thing for me. Everything has gone so smoothly and when I looked at my phone for the time, 1:11. (Angel support!)

It’s a short trip, just enough to get a new perspective on things. I plan to be back in Arizona sometime Sunday. How am I getting back? Don’t know. I’m sure I’ll know when I need to know! But for now, signing off, from On the road. (Technically in the plane!)