VISION QUEST IS LIKE A BOX OF CHOCOLATES, YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU’RE GOING TO GET!

I’m in Salt Lake City and heading back to over 100 degree temperatures tonight. I thought it was interesting that my confirmation number begins with GPS...GPSX7B.

Again, I haven’t had any vacations for quite awhile. These trips are vision quests. As Forrest Gump puts it," Life (Vision Quest) is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.” An important part of Vision Questing is not only taking time during the time away, but also after, to check in with myself. It’s important for me to take time for reflection to see how far I’ve come and where I still need to heal and where the refinement of skills are still needed on my personal journey.

The questions I’m asking myself. How did I do on this trip? Where was reaction and resistance emerging? Where was the brat running the show? Did I allow the wise parents to rise up and love her? Did I allow the wise parents to reassure her in her panty twists, that everything was going to be ok, that they had her back? Where did I still loose myself? As a friend recently put it, “I don’t want to inflict myself on anyone. (Definitely still a place for healing, codependency still alive and well.) Who inside me still needs outside approval, wants to fit in and who am I still seeking acceptance from? Where did I give away my power? Where did I live unconsciously, reverting back to old patterns and habits?

Conversely, I also need to remember how I was supported and rejuvenated. How from the very beginning the trip went smoothly. (When I arrived in Oakland, the billboards and angel numbers were amazing.)

Where had I grown and where had I stretched myself? Where was I joyful, full of love and light? Where had I allowed fun and excitement to enter into my soul?

By my answering the call of the Yuba, (through resistance) gave me a sense of replenishment, just by being in its energy. (The water was too high and too swift for swimming. Something very unusual for this time of year.) By driving in my daughter’s new red VW Eos (The Greek Goddess of the Dawn) convertible the cobwebs were cleared from my head. And riding a horse and just being around the baby horse helped me to regain a new zeal for live once again.

After having dinner at a mexican restaurant, I had a new vision for a property that I have my eye on in Tubac. And as my shaman friend pointed out, having several opportunities to work in Tubac, that Arizona is calling me back, just in this moment. So from Salt Lake City, I’m on the road again! Happy Summer!

YUBA RIVER

Where am I? Well, now it should read, where have I been? I flew into Oakland, CA, where the temperatures were lovely. I even needed a sweatshirt! We stayed with a college friend of my daughter’s on the Oakland Lake and went to yoga. Where the desert is a bit desolate this time of year, the lake was full of life and energy. It felt nice. We then drove up towards Grass Valley, to check into the Riverbend Retreat House situation and stopped at her cowgirl friend’s barn to ride gypsy’s, big gentle draft type horses. The little gypsy foal was so fun to watch with his tail that was so wavy it looked as though it had been permed. He began to feel his oats, wandering a bit from mamma, who was getting a bath. She kept calling him to stay close to her and he’d wander off just enough to give her cause for concern! Very cute to watch. I rode the lesson horse, Bella. Now that’s my kind of exercise. Holding onto the back of a horse bareback. My inner thighs are still talking about it!

Friday, I got to see how my little cottage is doing and try to make a decision on what is next down the pipe for it. I continue to explain away, always defending bad behavior and making excuses for everyone. Something I’ve always done and struggled with to overcome in my recovery process. I can always defend the underdog. As is the situation with the guests at the Retreat house. Everyone can see the situation clearly, except me. I have the gift of a 'quick to forget memory'. I quickly forget the facts that have taken me to the point of wanting to reclaim my cottage. I even hired a company to help me do that and now....I can explain and make excuses for the guests. Give me a flippin’ break!

We then visited one of my son’s and my daughter bought me (really herself, but boy am I having fun in it!) a new car! VW Eos (Meaning Greek Goddess of the dawn!) red convertible! Red meaning power (personal)! In Oakland, while on the phone with my shaman, we passed up a billboard which read, You’re Incredibly Powerful!) That is all that was on the billboard! I have no idea what they were advertising! (Angel support)

Staying at the home of my shaman, I should have expected no less as Saturday started off a bit traumatic for me. We watched a snake (we thought was dead) begin to move from it’s cave alongside the path and a frog jumped out of the washing machine onto me, after the cycle was over no less!

I had not planned to come to Grass Valley, and yet here I am. Without a doubt, I knew that after consulting with my friend she of course explained some possible parallels of these incidents to my life’s situation. (The snake and frog were both there as support in making decisions in my life to leave the past behind and move forward. And then adding that she new we would be staying at her home even though I had insisted that I had no plans for coming this way.

While in the area, I didn’t have time or a means of transportation to see any friends. And as I’m writing this we’re cleaning and off this AM, (Sunday) for Salt Lake City, UT. (With a short stop at the Yuba!) We’re spending the night in Elko and driving to SLC where I’ll catch my plane back to AZ while my daughter attends a basketball camp in UT. Happy rest of the weekend!