NEVER EVER, EVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAM!!!

A couple of incidents happened in my family that brought me back to the movie In Pursuit of Happyness. When my dad had come to CA for his last days on this earth, he, my boys and I went to see this movie. After it was over, I asked my dad, “So, what did you think?” “That’s just life!” he said non-chalantly. On a recent preview of this movie from a DVD, Will, the dad, said to his son, “Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do something, including me! If you want it, go and get it!”

My daughter had gotten the news a few days ago that she had been dropped from the D League in basketball. What a blow! She had moved back to the west coast in order to pursue her dream of becoming an NBA Basketball Referee. Now, I have absolutely zero doubt that if she wishes to pursue that dream, she’ll make it. It’s just a part of the journey in this life.

Don’t get me wrong. I know that it feels BAD! I get that. That’s a given. But life is about the journey, not the destination. How boring would it be if we reached our goals without any experiences! Like I told my daughter, “Now, you have more adventures to tell about how you achieved your dreams!

The time that it takes and the age that you are makes no difference! If you say something like, “I”ll be 60 when I get my degree if I start going for it now!” You’re going to be 60 anyway! Make YOUR life what YOU want!

The point is....NEVER EVER, GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS! Go for what you know that you want! Make it happen! Live your life with all of it’s ups and downs....Go for the Gold!!!!

COULD YOU PLEASE JUST LISTEN TO ME?

There are many times that a friend or loved one asks us to listen. To simply be a witness to their life’s journey.

There are many times that I do not just LISTEN. Wanting to save others (rescue) the many years of pain and therapy that I went through figuring out my life I sometimes forget that part of the process of each of our individual journeys involves figuring out things for ourselves. Learning what works and what doesn’t and many times that simply comes from the school of hard knocks. (Experience)

At times talking is how we begin to unwind the questions in our heads. When I ask you to hear me, I don’t want you to diminish my feelings or try to fix whatever it is that I’m telling you. All I’m asking is that you give me support and permission to feel what I feel.

I know from experience that when 'You do something for me, you prevent me from finding my own strength and power.’

And as far as giving me your unsolicited advice, I can get free advice in the local newspaper for 50 cents and that would include both Billy Graham and Dear Abby!

Several years back, I crashed my dad’s van and I called him to let him know what happened. The response I received was less than desirable. I understood his reaction to the accident was how he was trying to deal with his fear that something really serious could have happened to not only his van, but to it’s precious cargo....my daughter and me.

What that incident taught me was to ask two questions when any one had a problem. 1. Are you OK? 2. What can I do to help?
LISTEN to what they are feeling and how they are going to solve their problem, without trying to fix it or give unsolicited advice.

I have still have trouble at times, just listening....I know it’s part of the problem solving process and recovering from codependency tendencies, I still have a need to make the lives of others, better and less painful.

So the next time that you ask me to listen to what’s on your mind, I promise to try hard to do just that....I’M ALL EARS!!

YOU HAVE TO LET GO IN ORDER TO MAKE SPACE FOR NEW ADVENTURES!

OK, the first step to begin living the life you want is to decide what it is that you want. (Probably the hardest thing.)

Then the next step is having the courage to let go of what you have in order to get what you want.

A couple of recent examples:
My daughter wanted to pursue a career refereeing basketball. In order to follow that dream, she let go of her things and place in the bay area and moved only what she could fit into her honda civic. (Less a seat for me and my backpack!) After 5 years of perfecting her skill, she knew to advance further, she needed to move back to the west coast. Once again, she let go of everything familiar in order for that to happen.
HAPPY CREATING!!

Because she knew what she wanted and had the courage to let go of the familiar she now has been offered 3 contracts for the next year. When she came to the west coast, she didn’t know how things would work out. She had to trust that God/the Universe had her best interest in mind.

My other daughter and her husband, not knowing what they wanted, decided to find out and head out for the summer ‘vision questing,’ letting life unfold for them. She had the courage to quit her job, (he’s a school teacher) and they let their apartment go, along with most of their belongs. The rest they put into storage and have been living the summer following their hearts, living between their VW camper bus and their sailboat on the Columbia River. Vision Questing is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get, who’s going to show up and where you will end up!

In order to move forward in life, we have to let go of our ideas, our perception of things and of trying to control everything. Certainly it’s not everyone’s journey to live of life of dramatic change. But I believe that it is a part of everyone’s journey to follow their own intuition, heart and dreams.

Ask yourself:
What do you spend most of your time and energy trying to control? Would would happen if you let go?
What would you do if you weren’t afraid? Be honest and THINK BIG! DREAM THE UNIMAGINABLE, THE IMPOSSIBLE!! HAPPY CREATING!!